Information you won't find on this page:

1. Gourmet mushroom recipes

2. My Favorite Tech Support Phone Calls

3. A complete record of everything about me including my last 10 home addresses

4. Plot lines from my favorite Chassidic romance novels

5. Minutes from the last meeting at work with the man who gave us "the rest of the story" and autographed by aforementioned person

6. Excerpts from my newest bestseller, 9-5: How to say NO to Overworking

7. My theories on why sleeping more than 3.5 hours a day is unhealthy

8. My poetry in the style of Wordsworth on the beauty of the medical system and its practitioners, including my all-time favorite, "Oh, medical system, of much faith have I in you!"

9. How I love changing diapers; big dirty juicy ones.

10. My 10 page rant on the importance of putting on seat belts and how there should be more legislation on this matter.